It was only a few weeks ago that someone asked me for the date of my hens day because their 2018 was filling up, and to be honest I nearly vomited. Say wha!? Seriously isn’t the wedding like 2 years away? And then I checked my calendar and realised maybe ignorance isn’t always bliss?
In my case, the more the merrier! I want to make sure wedding guest gals have a good opportunity to meet others before landing themselves in Bali. We’re inviting such a blended group of friends to the wedding, and I want to make sure everyone semi knows one another and will enjoy themselves.
So that’s what I’m doing, but to be honest, just between you and me, I’d probably prefer something small and intimate because the idea of having all eyes on me scares the crap out of me and gets the anxiety running read hot. It’s funny (and kind of mushy) but even though we’re having a reasonably large wedding, I know that as long as Bill’s there waiting for me, I’ll be ok, he’s my rock and always manages to make me feel that little bit stronger. I got a good one, I know.
So while the idea of a small, bridal shower or high tea is totally more my scene, I’m embracing my 30+ guest list hens day and going with the flow. I want to be kept in the dark in regards to the proceedings of the day for the benefit of my own sanity, however I’ve got a few things on my Wishlist.
- Minimal tacky. No op shop formal dress themes or copious amounts of dicks floating round. I know I can’t avoid some form of penis (real or plastic), but I’m such an awkward person when it comes to attention, and putting me in a giant dick costume in front of crowds of other people will probably make me go hide in a bathroom and sober up quicker than the first shot went down.
- Minimal guest effort. Our wedding is in Bali so I want to make sure guests aren’t forking out hundreds of dollars for my hens day. Dream situation would be a weekend away in Sorrento, but weekends away cost money, and ain’t nobody got a bottomless pit of that good stuff.
- I love wineries or big outdoor spaces. There’s something about being outside, sitting around a large table talking absolute rubbish that screams ‘me’. Mainly because often not a word that comes out of my mouth post 1 drink has any truth to it, but also because I hate standing around or being cramped in small spaces. You may as well throw me into a torture room with a tonne of dick straws. Plus as a side fact, I have really bad hearing and struggle indoors – yes fun fact, I’m deaf as a post!
- Minimal travel. This is where it gets tricky. I get motion sickness, especially when drinking, so need to limit the amount of time spent on buses and the like. Nobody thought the hen with vomit on her chin was cute. Nobody.
Now that I’m putting it all down in this post, I’m starting to think I’ve created an impossible day for my bride squad. Hmmmm… oh well! I’ve got the best of the best on board and I’m pretty confident that with Shari Hanily on the job it’ll be a ripper day regardless.
Anywho, the day will be a delight. I’m certain I’ll probably end up ‘white girl wasted’ and all of these Wishlist items will be pointless, but, with any luck it will be after lunchtime. 😉
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